Timbaland is opening up about just how close his battle with prescription drugs came to costing him his life.
During a recent conversation with B High ATL, the legendary producer reflected on his past addiction to OxyContin and admitted that, although he never considered himself suicidal, he now realizes his daily drug use amounted to slowly killing himself.
“I ain’t never think about suicide, but then I said, you know what? I was committing suicide every day,” Timbaland said.
The Grammy-winning producer recalled his then-wife witnessing him stop breathing while he slept, one of the clearest indications that his addiction had reached a potentially fatal level. Timbaland said he now credits God with carrying him through a period that could have ended much differently.
His prescription drug dependency originally developed after he began taking painkillers to deal with lingering nerve damage from being shot as a teenager. What started with Vicodin eventually escalated into heavy OxyContin use as Timbaland dealt with physical pain and turmoil in his personal life.
During a 2023 appearance on Club Shay Shay, Timbaland revealed that at the height of his addiction he was taking approximately 160 milligrams of OxyContin per day. He said most people he knew who consumed pills at similar levels were now dead.
He also recalled experiencing what he described as an out-of-body moment in which he saw himself lying in bed, another experience that forced him to confront the severity of his addiction.
The Virginia-born producer has previously acknowledged that his drug use affected both his personal life and his creativity. Despite being responsible for some of the biggest records of his generation, Timbaland has said the music he is most proud of came when he was sober.
Ultimately, he credits his children with helping give him the motivation to change his life. He has also said Jay-Z and Drake were among those who confronted him when they recognized his behavior was spiraling.
Years removed from the darkest period of his addiction, Timbaland now looks back at his OxyContin dependency with a different understanding. What he once viewed as simply taking pills to cope with pain had become a daily threat to his life.
“I was committing suicide every day.”
For Timbaland, surviving it ultimately became bigger than getting clean—it became realizing just how close he came to never getting another chance.
